I realized something yesterday that I think a lot of 25 year olds are also realizing. As we grew up we were constantly put into groups. Whether it was a beginning dance class or a t-ball team, we were given a group of people like ourselves to become friends with. As we grew up that group of people may have changed slightly as our interests changed but probably not by much. When we got to college we were put on a dorm floor, possibly even in a learning community of people with the same major, and most likely became friends with them. Another group put there to make it easy for us to make friends and feel comfortable.

Then we left college and moved into the real world and away from most of our friends. Depending on your job, you may have still found another group of people that you could become friends with. But what if you work in a small business with people who aren’t your age? Or you just don’t like the people that work with you? How are you supposed to make friends then?

What I realized last night is that I just don’t know how to make friends without the help of a pre-set group. As someone who always considered themselves to be a very social person, that is the weirdest thing to admit. So how do I do it? How do I find a group of people who, like me, want to sit at home on a Friday night with a good meal and a glass of wine and talk? Or maybe a group to go hiking with? How am I supposed to make friends?

Here’s my plan. Since there isn’t exactly a book club at my office, I’m going to go out and find one. I’m also going to go find a yoga or exercise class, possibly an art class, maybe even a hiking club, and I’m going to make myself be the one to say “Hi.” I’m also going to say “yes” a lot. It’s pretty easy for me to get wrapped up in my cozy blanket of homebodyness but if I do that, I also get lonely and lazy and grumpy after a bit so by saying “yes,” even to things I might not want to do right then, I’ll fight those feelings. Hopefully I’ll manage to get out of my shell a little bit, have a couple of adventures, and make some new friends.

Saying yes is also going to extend to you guys, if there are any of you. If you have any suggestions of places I should go, or things I should try, let me know! I’ll do my best to say yes, and I’ll be keeping track of all of my adventures right here on my blog so you’ll be able to enjoy my wins, losses, and in-betweens. If you’re feeling the same way, I’m also inviting you to join me in this endeavor. Let me know by tweeting me at @KNdoubleU with the hashtag #YesTo25 and I’ll follow along with you as well. Who knows, maybe we’ll create our own little friend finding support group and end up friends as well.


Choose to See The Good Stuff

Have you ever had one of those days when everything is going just right? The weather is perfect, you've gotten more done than you planned but also had time to squeak in a nap and you're laying there in bed feeling like you're ready for anything the next day throws at you because today you were a productivity machine. But then your phone rings. You know that you don't have to answer since its after 10 an you really should be drifting off to sleep but you answer anyway because hey, it could be an emergency or something so you answer anyway and BOOM. The person on the other end takes your good mood and craps all over it with their bad mood. That's exactly what happened to me last night.  I felt amazing after a weekend of knocking things off of the to do list and was ready to start my week full of good vibes. I'd managed to balance a little "me time" with actual work and that for me is a definite accomplishment.

I got off of the phone feeling like no matter how well I'm doing, there will always be some one to poke holes in that good feeling and proceeded to spend the next 4 hours (yup I was up until after two even though I got in bed ready to sleep at 10) surfing the internet looking at lifestyle and fashion blogs, choosing a new theme (what do you think?!), and trying to forget the conversation I had just had.  It wasn't until this morning over my Irish breakfast tea that I realized someone else's bad mood had been the only reason I stayed up WAY past my bed time and felt grumpier than Oscar The Grouch.

Instead of continuing to let it ruin my day, I decided to try and access that good feeling I'd had not so long ago and keep that energy going into my day.  I put on some J-Biebs and One Direction, jumped in the car to head to work, and listed off all of the good things I had done the day before.  By the time I was pulling into my parking spot, I felt immensely better. The simple decision to accept that I'm never going to be able to make EVERYONE happy but I can make ME happy was all it took to kick the week off on the right foot. So I'm going to challenge all of you to take a few minutes and think about all of the good things you have going on today and use that energy to get you through the week.  After all, focusing on the bad stuff is the only way to guarantee you'll have a bad day.



A Productive Weekend

Hello Joyflakes :)

It is late Sunday evening and I'm snuggled into bed under our new twinkle lights feeling very cozy.  This weekend Misha and I tackled the final few boxes in our rooms AND did all of our laundry.  To say that I'm feeling accomplished doesn't even cut it.  We now have a fully functional "front room" where we can get away from everything and then our bed room which I have fully decked out in a new tapestry and copper wire twinkle lights.  I am more than a little obsessed with these twinkle lights.  They're just so dainty and cute!

A photo posted by Kae N-W (@kndoubleu) on

After a long Saturday of unpacking and organizing and going through all of my clothes to see what I could get rid of, I used today to have a little me time.  It started with an impromptu brunch at the Bluebird Diner which is always a great option if you're within 20 miles and need some perfectly poached Eggs Benedict.  Post brunch where I clearly ate too much, we headed to Costco and wandered about picking up everything our odd little family of 5 roommates could ever want. By the time we got home all that I wanted to do was curl up on the futon and read.  Which I did for all of about 10 minutes before I zonked out and napped the morning away.  Finally fully rested, I spent the afternoon watching movies and snuggling Izzy.  To say it was a lazy day is an understatement...but I did manage to get a tiny bit of work done before enjoying a face mask, glass of red wine, and more Izzy snuggles.  Now cleansed and moisturized I'm ready to get to bed and grab a full 40 winks before starting out on a new week.  I think that having two days off in a row agrees with me!  Keep your eyes pealed for more updates throughout the week! I promise they'll be more exciting than this was and contain less naps.


#confessions Vol. 1

Happy Thursday Joyflakes!

I'm kicking off a new series today that's all about making confessions.  I'm laying out all of my guilty pleasures from large to small for all of you to enjoy and I can't think of a better way to introduce you to the series than with this video...

Yup.  That's my boy J-Biebs singing his heart out to the lovely sounds of an acoustic guitar.  This particular guilty pleasure started out on the 3rd floor of Parks Library at Iowa State when I stumbled onto his early youtube videos.  I couldn't stop watching this little kid absolutely kill every song he sang.  Over the years I've hidden my love of J-Biebs and when he does something dumb, I'm glad I did but I simply can't hide it anymore...especially when he puts out acoustic jamz!  How can you not love that voice?!

Until Vol. 2



Hello Joyflakes!

In case you've missed it, or you don't follow me on social media (feel free to change that!), I've been tweeting a LOT.  During my first few years of college I started tweeting and I was mildly obsessed. Every move I made, twitter knew about it. But somewhere along the way, I lost my ability to shamelessly self promote my dinner plans and my twitter feed went silent.  Sure I still checked in every once and a while and once I started this blog I started tweeting when I posted a new blog entry, but I didn't feel like I really had anything to say.  That sounds crazy, especially coming from a blogger, but it's the truth.

You see, if you'd asked me about four months ago where I would be today, I would have said something like "I don't know, working the same job and dreading going to work in the morning?" My outlook on my foreseeable future was pretty bleak.  I was incredibly unhappy and letting myself wallow in it.  Not to mention I was dragging everyone else around me into my pit of grumpiness.

All of that changed when I decided to put an end date on my job.  I decided that come hell or high water I was going to find another job.  ANY job that wasn't the one I had in order to start pulling myself up by my bootstraps. The kicker was that I gave myself until my cousins wedding (like...two and a half months?) to find another job or I would quit without one.  I couldn't take it anymore.  Thankfully, one week before the deadline I was offered a position working at one of the hospitals in town and I jumped on it.  Sure it wasn't a glamorous job but it was something to start me moving in a direction again.

The Thursday before we left for the wedding I was walking out of a final exam when my professor offered me a note asking me to get in touch with him if I was interested in a paid internship at his company.  It was right then and there that my entire outlook changed.  The job would be to blog about college in a multitude of different ways, both silly buzzfeed-y posts and ones backed by science.  It would be 9-5 and pay just what I need to get by so the issue was that I had already accepted a position and I couldn't work at the hospital and at his company.  After a week of talking it over with my family and friends, I jumped in head first and accepted the position at my professors company and gave the hospital my 1 day notice.

For the first time in a very long time, work is something that I enjoy getting up and doing.  I feel like I actually know what I'm doing and that my work is appreciated.  I get to 5 o'clock and feel like the day has flown by.  I know that it has only been two weeks in my new position and things aren't always going to been this bright and shiny but for right now, I'm going to keep riding this high. And I'm definitely going to keep tweeting my happiness to the world, because you can never have too much positivity.


P.S. Pretty fitting that this is coming out on 9/9 since my favorite number is 9!