"it's happening. right now, trying to call family"

It happend.  I've known that this day was coming for a while and to be very honest, I've been doing my best to block it out of my thoughts completely.  We're not talking put it away in a cardboard box in my mind, we're talking about building a great wall of china around it. Keeping out even the tiniest of thoughts, which is incredibly difficult given my line of work and I'm sure that I regularly fail at it.

So what happened when the bomb finally dropped?  First, I'm going to be very honest, I freaked out a little bit. I did a little happy dance, immediately started planning, and sent a text that I am completely sure did not convey the proper amount of emotions happening inside of my person. Second, I took note of the fact that the bomb had finally dropped and I was the only one left standing.  I had been anticipating loneliness, dread, and mild anxiety, but what I instead felt, was something akin to (dare I say it?) relief?  

Working in jewelry I am surrounded daily by talk about wedding rings and engagements.  As a 24 year old, I'm bombarded with engagement announcements on all forms of social media.  Being a girl, I was taught from a very young age that my engagement and wedding would be the most amazing moments of my life outside of the day that I inevitably pop out a child. The problem with this is, that all of that makes the amazing date you went on or the surprise Savion Glover tickets (yes I am STILL fangerling over here) that you received, somehow less important.  Why is it that we have to hit the next "mile stone" in order to feel like our lives are on the right track? Why can't we just savor those happy moments and teach little girls that the best day of their life will be the day they meet their best friend?

With that wonderful and exciting text still fresh in my inbox, I officially became the last of the small circle of friends that I speak to on a daily or weekly basis without a ring on that very special finger.  I thought I would be more, I don't know, depressed about it? but in actuality, it solidified what I have been thinking for a while now.  I am also the only person I know that doesn't have to worry about seating plans, menus, cake flavors, save the dates, invitations, registries, hurting peoples feelings, dealing with in-laws (not that I don't love my significant others family, but that takes things up a significant notch), and the pressure to have one singular "perfect" day that you (hopefully) only get once.  I get to enjoy every day and keep dreaming about that "perfect" someday.

So to all of my wonderful and amazing happily engaged besties, CONGRATULATIONS!  I am so happy for all of you and absolutely cannot wait to drink, dance, and celebrate with you on your special day! And thank you for making all of the decisions for me so I can do the drinking, dancing, and celebrating with you and just enjoy it!

Until next time